Understanding Soul Contracts: How They Shape Relationships

The Basics of How They Work

You met Bobby and felt an instant attraction. Bobby wasn’t particularly nice to you, though. He mistreated you, called you names, bossed you around, pushed your buttons… and ultimately caused you to get over your submissiveness, find your power, and stand up to his bullying.

Looking back, what was that all about? Why were you so drawn to this poor excuse for a human being if, in your heart of hearts, you knew it was never going to work anyway?

Let’s rewind time. No, not back to when you were a bright-eyed 20-year-old. Back to when you were on the other side, in the spirit realm, planning this lifetime that you’re having now.

You’re a soul, sitting there on a cloud (or in a room with your Council, or whatever image you prefer!) Bobby’s soul, who has been with you for many lifetimes and who loves you dearly, is by your side, also planning its upcoming journey as a human being. And you ask Bobby’s soul, “When we’re down there on Earth, I need you to come into my life when I’m about 25 and act like a total jerk towards me in order to challenge me to learn my life lesson of Empowerment. Pretty please?”

Bobby’s soul sighs and says, “Alright. Then once you’ve learned your lesson, promise that you’ll dump me in a really painful way to help me snap out of my old role and start on my life lessons of Caring and Compassion”.

“I’ll be sure to make it hurt, buddy,” you respond.

And thus, the two of you create a soul contract that is written into both of your life plans… which you, of course, have zero recollection of once you’re born and immersed in this game of life.

This was an example of a soul contract that is consciously chosen by a soul for an upcoming lifetime in order to have new experiences, learn a lesson, heal a past trauma, overcome a block, or cultivate a new quality. We usually make such contracts with souls we choose to be our parents, siblings, life partners, best friends, and other impactful characters in our life (and no — not all of them will be jerks!)

Contracts that were consciously chosen for this lifetime are considered beneficial to the soul, even though “beneficial” doesn’t mean “easy” or “happy”.

Folks often want to know about their life partner contract. From my experience doing Akashic readings, many of us do have such contracts with specific souls. However, not all of us do. Some folks have a choice when it comes to who to partner up with and whether to partner up at all, which, in a way, is freeing.

There are occasionally soul contracts that are not with our fellow human beings… For example, one may have a contract to work with a group of extraterrestrial beings in this life — to serve as a source of information for them or to bring their healing methods, teachings, or technologies to humanity. This is often revealed when a person comes to a Quantum Healing or other regression-based type of session, trying to understand why they’ve been having ET contact experiences and what those beings want from them.

There is another category of soul contracts, which you’ll often hear about in Akashic Record readings: past-life soul contracts. Those are contracts that were created, consciously or unconsciously, through some choices you made during one of your past incarnations and that you’re still carrying around as of now.

Typically, past-life soul contracts are considered undesirable because they somehow hold you back in your current experience, e.g., by making it hard to create balanced relationships, achieve success, or follow your chosen path.

For instance, there’s a type of past-life soul contract that may cause you to attract broken people into your life and feel responsible for healing and rescuing them. Then there’s a type that would cause you to always expect someone to protect and provide for you. And there’s another type of contract that would make you feel like something or someone is missing from your life, or that would unnecessarily keep you tied to a person that really shouldn’t be in your life this time… None of that sounds appealing, right?

When those undesirable contracts come up in readings, we usually sever them so that they no longer hold you back.

Sometimes, we’ll also find, in readings or regression sessions, that entities or spirits are attached to a person because of a contract between that spirit and the person, that the contract was created in another incarnation and needs to be severed before the entity/spirit can be released.

Can present-life soul contracts be severed? Sometimes, folks ask this question when a relationship they’re in is particularly challenging or even abusive.

You will hear different opinions on this. My current understanding is that ideally, we would want to complete our lessons with the other person in order to fulfill that contract, and after that, we can go our separate ways.

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